In some female-led relationships the male may even be asked to occasionally provide sexual service with his penis while foregoing his own orgasm, a profound mental and physical challenge. Other female-led relationships will be oriented so the chastised male will more often than not provide sexual service in every way except by using his penis. Ultimately, it is for you to decide how best to weave chastity into your relationship. What is important to understand, however, is that chastity is one great way to keep your submissive man feeling and expressing his submissiveness to you.

Almost every account of a chastity regimen notes that the man becomes much more attentive to the needs of his partner, serving her better both sexually and in a myriad of other ways that are pleasing to her.

Female-led relationships require the male to overcome this biological predisposition and the cultural conditioning that reinforces it. Female-led relationships require the male to find ultimate pleasure in his partner’s pleasure, rather than subordinating her pleasure to his own. As the Female-led relationship develops, the female becomes more in control and more restrictive of her submissive male.

10 Rules in Femdom Relationship

1. Respect for Women – Yes I absolutely respect women and want to see a woman be the first President of the United States

2. Submission to Female Authority – I am married almost 33 years and have been submissive to my wife almost 32+ years.

3. Service to Goddess – My Goddess is my wife and I serve as her sissy husband and maid at home. In the colder months I shave completely and wear pretty lingerie to please her. Our lingerie is my responsibility to wash fold or hang. She has me happily panty trained and I am slowly collecting bras that fit my small breasts.

4. Female Body Worship – I bathe and shave her as requested and enjoy offering her oral pleasure with nothing expected in return.

5. Obedience Training & Discipline – I have purchased for her paddles, wooden handled straps, crops and canes and she uses them on me routinely. In a moments notice she can tell me to be over her lap and I will accept a hand spanking. She carries a small wooden paddle in her purse for punishment when needed outside of the house.

6. Tease & Denial – As I mentioned above, I will orally please her and expect nothing in return. Many a night I have gone to bed with the taste of her pussy and ass on my tongue and a restricted erection in my cage.

7. Enforced Male Chastity & Strict Orgasm Control – I am permanently locked in a steel chastity device and my Goddess will never let me out. She even insisted that I get my penis pierced so that there will be absolutely no chance of escape, no matter how desperate I become.

8. Strap-On Training – She has a good leather harness and several dildos she likes to use on me. I can ejaculate when pegged.

9. Discomfiture & Humiliation – I am branded with two hearts (interlocking) and I will soon be required to wear a permanent collar around my neck. She takes me panty and bra shopping and makes me wear lingerie for all outings. I must prepare tea and lunches for her various women’s groups, and curtsy and bow while serving all of the ladies in attendance.

10. Housework – I do all of the housework – cooking, cleaning, dusting, vacuuming, laundry and mopping – while she is free to relax and pursue her own interests. This is how life should be in a female-dominated home, with the male hoping to be rewarded with additional chores.

 

Almost everyone is in a good mood except  for my daughter. When doing a load of wash and wear David forgot to put the machine on the delicate mode. From what I can gather he received a lecture that he will remember for quite a while. If they were not so busy with the children I suspect she would have given him a page full of lines to write. It is amazing that simply having a man write something like ‘I will remember to put the washing machine on delicates’ over and over again has a way of making him remember. Entrusting your clothing to a man is kind of a big step. Most submissive men enjoy doing laundry for their mistress, but it is a responsibility that some men do not take as seriously as they should. Sometimes they are afraid to ask for instructions, or they are simply careless as David may have been in this instance.

To tell the truth, I got quite a bit scolded by my Mistress for having raised the question I did in my comment here. She has explained me that it was very inappropriate to question her authority in that way. I have been thankful to her for explaining me that and it is a lesson learned for me. I would say in reacting the way she did, she already proved my doubting wrong. In this case, like in some others in the recent past when I have not been obedient and deferring as I should, I have been losing some freedoms, which so far I took for granted. And I will have to earn them back. And already out of love to her and respect for her I have every intention of doing that.
What I like about your last blog entry is that it stresses that it is arguably not in the big things, but more in the small, everyday things that we as submissive men can serve our Mistresses well and contribute to a more fulfilled live for her. I am aware that I still have too much of a tendency to do things “big style” to please my Mistress and in-between I keep failing to fulfill the meanwhile numerous duties I have towards her. This is all spelled out in our FLR contract which I signed about half a year ago. When we first discussed the idea it felt right and not like a big change to what we doing anyway. But the closer the day came, the more it took proportions similar to “getting married” and there was growing turmoil of my emotions.

I knelt at both of their feet (YUM unto itself!) and did my part of the tasks while they talked and caught up. (It was on a second floor landing) It was so fun and so rare an opportunity to publicly kneel at multiple women’s feet while they paid me no mind. That I relish it to this day! Frankly, I think they loved it too!

Rachael (not her real name) was so sweet and thankful and at one point went off to get me a knife or some scissors or something. I got to kiss the Queen’s hand from my knees while she was gone. She beamed as I blushed and knelt happily at her feet.

 

In it I chronicled my impressions of an experience of being ‘volunteered’ to do a chore for a lady friend of the Queen’s.

She is a good lady and a strong and confident lady as well. I really enjoy her company and doing little chores for her is fun. And when I am doing them under the direction of Her Majesty, well it’s just delightful! Two strong and confident women gently bossing me around! It’s Like a Visit to Pussy Whipped Paradise!

So always try to think of things beforehand that will shine a good light on your Lady or one of the other Ladies who will be in attendance (hopefully a Lady that YOUR Lady Boss approves of! – Don’t make a BIG mistake here!). Then use your limited speaking time to bring up this story. Be quiet afterward and let the Ladies do the talking. If you can do this well, you will be sought after for EVERY gathering! And THAT is precisely what you want, to be endlessly surrounded by women who feel good about themselves when you are near!

The Ladies knew what to do and took it from where I had left it. I had no need to speak again which is generally a good thing. Men are here to do as they are asked, not to launch into some topic of their own and try to talk over the Ladies! And besides I had used my opportunity to fulfill one of the cardinal rules of Surrendered Husbandhood, I had honored my Queen to her friend in front of both of them. I could have blushed. Oh how I pray for MORE opportunities like that!

The ladies had all kinds of people and things to talk about and catch up on, so without any further instructions I simply knelt at both of their feet and started to remove the flags. They paid no open attention to me as I worked for several minutes until they realized that I was stuck on the very last knot and had spent a long time on it.

When they realized that I was all but done, Ms. Rachael said: “Oh look he’s been doing all the work and we’ve just been standing here talking all this time!” Then they both laughed, I blushed a little and remained docilely silent at their feet. I felt like this is EXACTLY how life should be! Women are to be revered, they should not be required to do lowly manual tasks if men are available!

Ms. Rachael went off to get me a pair of scissors to cut the final knot. When she left, Mistress wasted no time in standing very close to me. She patted me on the head and stroked my hair like I was her little doggie. I gave her back a soft and jovial “Woof Woof!”.

She laughed about it just a little. But I KNOW that she was feeling as warm inside as I was at that moment. I think at this point in the evening all three of us were in agreement about how life ought to be lived! Men were to be quiet, cute, and busy doing chores to serve women. While the women were to be served and revered.

I sometimes think my Queen laughs in situations like this because it is her fantasy coming true and she cannot believe or accept that it is now her reality. “My man is obediently kneeling at my feet and doing little menial chores for me right now! He is right where I have always wanted him and right where I have always felt that he belonged! OH YUM!”

I finished my task and the two of us left for dinner. Mistress invited Ms. Rachael to join us but she did not wish to go. I know that I would have enjoyed sitting quietly beside Her Majesty while the two of them continued their talk but, “Her Will Be Done!”

I drove us to a Thai restaurant that Mistress likes. I am not so crazy about it but again always remember…. “Her Will Be Done!”

The waiter must have been new. We had to ask him for glasses of water and when he came to take our order he actually looked right at me and said “What will you have Sir?” I said nothing and with raised eyebrows and tilted head, I looked over toward Mistress as in: “I defer unto Thee Madame.” Her Ladyship did not miss a beat as she instructed him: “I will be ordering first!”

OH MY HEART SKIPPED AN ASSERTIVE LADY BEAT!!! YUM!!! Power to the Ladies Right on! Remember, that unless there is an element of danger involved – Ladies Go First At Everything! They go through the door you held for them first. They go to the table at the restaurant first and wait for you to pull out their chair, they order first, etc. “Ladies First”

I felt like she had put him in his place and had reminded me of mine all at the same time. Her confidence and assertiveness in all things Female just seems to grow and grow! And I love it as does she! I know that she enjoyed it because she mentioned the incident later as well with a smile on her face.

Wonderful affirmation of the coming of age of a satisfying female led relationship!

To be of service to my Queen is wonderful!

To be of some service to my Queen AND her friends is delightful!

But, if I could somehow be of service to both my Queen and her friends AND all of their sisters around the world it would be infinitely better!

Let us all do all we can to usher in this new Millennium of Women properly!

My wife hasn’t done the laundry in forever. I do it four to five times weekly. I sweep and mop the tile floors and pick up and vacuum the rest of the flat. I make her coffee every day, and on the weekends make her breakfast. She gets massages either foot or full body four to five times a week. Dishes are always clean. She only cooks a few times a week. I love serving her so much.

Now that my wife is back to work I am expected to have the lunches made and breakfast served with a fruit smoothie everyday. She even has me helping her friend out with miscellaneous jobs. Her mother is very impressed which is a nice feeling for me.

I applaud you Jason for your role and position in your marriage ! My marriage of 14 years is very similar to yours. I was always pushing the baby stroller, dusting, mopping, dishes, vacuuming, ironing, grocery shopping, cleaning windows. My wife makes all of the major decisions in “her” household, and she is the absolute envy of many of her female colleagues. Most of my friends and relatives have gotten comfortable knowing who really “wears the pants” in her household. To be perfectly honest with you, I am probably one of the most happiest males in the world ! Some women are natural born leaders, as are some males, and some women followers and submissive as are so many males ! Husbands like you and I Jason are perfect role models for males in an ever changing society and world that females will eventually dominate and control. Serving my wife as a secondary/support role in our marriage has given her great assurance, that I “know my place” !!

 

I could see how serious she was and I just stopped arguing and got sullen and quiet. In a few minutes I was opening her car door for her (as I do every single time she goes anywhere with me – the rest of you start doing this too!) and apologizing for having been so out of control. She was semi-placated but it would take something more to repair this one.

Driving there I probably apologized two or three more times and took her hand and kissed it a couple of times. She became increasing relaxed now and as she slowly realized that I was back in my place. During the trip I thought long and hard about how I had forgotten my own advice about being open and flexible to her will and showing the love and reverence that I always felt by being calm and ready to change direction when she wanted me to. I thought about how I could better prevent this type of thing from continuing to happen, and I remembered something I had read once about a marriage counselor who was not experiencing great success in her job and had a couple come in that just could not stop fighting.

The counselor decided to try a radical new approach. Her advice was for the wife to simply put a band aid on hubbie’s mouth when they fought and he would then remember to be silent. He could not speak again until she came and removed it. Everyone thought it was a crazy idea and that it wouldn’t work. Even though the counselor never let on that she had her doubts. But as their relationship was just so tattered and close to the end, and little else had worked for them or any other couples, they tried it.

When we started talking about my ‘flexibility’ she said “That really is a good word for you. It is something that you could work on.” I really do want to be more open to HER will. I want to be more flexible to doing what she wants and living as she wants me to! I want to be a more comfortable and easier to control tool in her hands. She did not say what she said in a way that meant “I want to have more control over you”, but I know that part of her sees it as my role to be the flexible one and mold myself more to her liking. She wants me to be her “good boy” at all times and to BE her tool who will live only to serve and obey her. She likes being served. She LIKES being Queen and she WANTS to be revered and obeyed more deeply and more of the time!

When we arrived at our hotel, I was still in a fairly deeply submissive mood but I was also a bit afraid of what was to come. I had been thinking on the way down how to give more control to her. I had been thinking of how to avoid both the anger I felt when she went into the closet first and to simply BE the happy servant who waits upon his Lady Boss. At the time, I SHOULD have either gone to do something else or sat quietly with a smile waiting for her to be done. But I did not and to that failure I feel shame.

Also I NEVER should have raised my voice to her. If she is angry, it is because I have disappointed or upset her and I need to apologize and submit quickly and completely!

Once we got to the hotel room, I got down on both knees and kissed the backs of her hands. I apologized again. Probably the fifth time for what I had done, and she giggled a little because it was kind of over the top, but she enjoyed it too! Then I got up and hugged her and whispered in her ear that I didn’t want to ever argue with her again and that if she ever thought I was getting angry or out of control, then she should have a secret signal that she could give me to stop me. “You could put up your hand and say ‘stop’, or you could raise your finger to your lips and ‘shh’ me.

She seemed a little shy about the whole proposition at first but said: “I like the finger to the lips.” And right then I think I could have drawn a pretty little cartoon heart right over her now ever increasingly dominant vagina! She LOVED IT!

I think that she felt a REAL surge of power and ownership right then and even though she may have doubted it later had all really happened just like it did, she was in contented BOSS WOMAN mode from then on that night! She was satisfied that I had taken my surrender to a new level.

She had told me things that she had never said to anyone and her whole personality just changed. She has NEVER said anything mean or gossipy to me about anyone before. But I could just feel her grabbing the power that was always hers and starting to wave it around that night. Our argument, followed by her victory, and then my utter collapse at her feet had awakened a real tigress that night!

I began to feel like I had married one of the (and I say this with the UTMOST RESPECT) “Alpha Bitches” in school and it was years later and She was STILL better than anyone else and She could put them down with ease and I WAS THE LUCKIEST BOY WHO EVER BREATHED to live under HER umbrella of bitchy domination!

(You DO know that the word Bitch means Being In Total Control of Hubby don’t you?)
She had talked like this all the way there in the car in a slowly increasing tempo, and now in the bar it was peaking! I simply agreed with her with all due docility and kissed her hand a few times and apologized and was sweet and quiet. I WE BOTH LIKED IT!

She bitched TOO me and not about me concerning these people and as long as I was in a mood of total submission and completely docile to her will, she treated me like I was her good and obedient pet and she was sweet to me. But toward these others I was there to listen to her bitch session and feel the release of her long bottled up wrath and well frankly to sweetly agree with her about everything.

When I sat at the basically full bar, there was an attractive your blonde in the seat next to me. I did not think she would have any interest in old married me sitting there with someone who was obviously my wife or my date. But she did! She said “Hello” and made pleasant conversation with me! It was all I could do to keep my cool and talk with her in the sweetest most basic pleasantries while I let her size me up.

Back in the room after an hour or so in the bar with her bitching and laughing at all the people who are inferior to her, and me adoring and hoping to be worthy, we went upstairs to our room. I KNEW that my utter surrender to her and ‘our’ new plan to make certain that she not only WON EVERY ARGUMENT FROM NOW ON but that I would be silenced, and humiliated and submissive and apologetic afterward had turned HER ON! It had turned her on in a BIG way and it had released that Mighty and Sacred Bitch Beast within her! I now knew that her new level of power had gone straight to her well ‘some part of her’…!

Over the next few minutes I got to give pleasure more than once and did not take any for myself. A “win win” situation as She has pleasure, and I stay charged up to give her more pleasure later!

But WAIT THERE’S MORE!

An hour later (and it was kind of warm in the room) she asked “How asleep are you?” I was awake enough and told her so.

At that point she said: “Well if you don’t mind, you can massage my feet now.”

It was really a command but she had put in a ‘nice way’.

O M G!!!! It’s the middle of the night and “You can massage my feet now!!!???” OK!!! SUBBY HUBBY HEAVEN HERE WE COME!!!!

I got up and went to the foot of the bed. It was dark and she reached for where I was and said: “Where are you?” I told her. She laughed and handed me a little bottle of hand cream. I knelt and kissed each toe individually. I was in PARADISE!!!! Kiss, kiss, kiss. Then I kissed the ball of each foot and did a very gentle and chaste licks of the base of each toe.

I had introduced myself to MAJESTY!!! Now I got to work and worked the cream into her right foot all around and worked her muscles. Mostly it was massage and a very occasional and chaste kiss! I worked her foot for about 15 minutes. Then she complained about the heat in the room.

I worshiped and adored and massaged and kissed it for about 15 minutes also. At that time I asked where her right foot had gone. “You’ve already done that one. You can come back to bed now.” I did as I was told and got to sleep in the most delightfully Pussy Whipped state I have been in, in a long time! I slept nude and was still chaste for a few days since last she had ‘encouraged’ my release.

After I sat down, Blondie turned and started to flirt with me until she saw my collar. Then her eyes really lit up and she began to inspect that collar closely and saw Mistress holding my leash. She told Mistress how ‘pretty’ my collar looked and how she had seen several couples lately that had gone to a fully collared lifestyle, and how she thought it was just “So Romantic!” for the man to show how totally committed he was!

She told us that she was thinking about only going out with guys who would consider it now because all the collared husbands she had met seemed to be “So Sweet and So Very Well Behaved!” Mistress said: “Oh he USUALLY behaves! DON’T YOU HONEY!?” then she gave my leash a tug and acted a bit menacing toward me. I flinched and said a soft “Yes Ma’am…”. They both laughed powerfully and in a state of overwhelming control. I smiled and laughed too. But my laugh was a nervous chuckle designed only to placate them.

It seemed that ALL the women were starting to love us ‘collared boys’ and thought we were SO SWEET and Well Behaved! And the other women were all a little jealous of the relationships the Alpha Women had over their male slaves.

We went to an opera matinee and I always enjoy doing that! The crowd is so, so, well so FEMALE! Yes there are men there but mostly we are there are escorts and arm candy and I love it! The men to me look kind of nondescript while the ladies dress and hold themselves as the divine rulers of the universe that they truly are! To look around the hall at the couples there is to see many female power dynamic pairings and it’s beautiful! Not every couple looks like that but there seems to be a higher percentage there than anywhere else I know of.

Afterward we drove home and again around bedtime the excitement of the whole weekend coupled with my extended chastity had me auditioning for the role of the ‘very good boy’ for her! It had been a couple of days since my pledge of surrender had been spoken and it had not yet had to be used, but her ability to “shush” me whenever she wanted had been handed over to her from my knees and I am sure that she was starting to think “Did that really happen? Will he really obey when I first want to use it?”

I was just as determined at that point as I had been two days earlier to cede all argumentative powers to her and to BEHAVE for her at all the times. In close quarters I re-iterated my pledge. I openly promised to be ‘her good boy’ from now on. There will be no more arguments. I will simply submit. Just remember to “shoosh” me my Queen and I will surrender’! She LOVED IT!!! She started to feel a new surge of warm power and superiority all over AGAIN!

 

Over the past 18 months my husband and I have transitioned to a full FLR. There was some bumps on the road, but I am very satisfied with the way things have turned out. He does absolutely all the housework, doesn’t question my decisions, gives me wonderful foot massages, wears panties only, shave his cock and balls, and worships me orally whenever I want for as long as I want. As you have pointed out many times, chastity training is the key to a successful FLR. Hubby went from several releases a week to our current regime of one very three weeks – sometimes four. This seems to be just the right duration to keep him constantly obedient and void of any free will. I often employ the use of a chastity device that I hold the keys for. When we started he couldn’t wear the thing for 60 minutes without complaining of discomfort. Through patience and sheer determination I have regularly kept him locked for weeks at a time. Denying not only orgasms, but even his ability to get hard is an absolute erotic power trip that words cannot describe. Our love making is the best it’s ever been. Without the ability to achieve an erection his focus remains solely on his pleasuring his Queen.  At the end of the month I will be going on a 4 day business trip. Hubby will be home alone. I am working on quite a long list of chores and some deep cleaning housework that will keep him busy, but I don’t totally trust him to not take advantage of the situation and play with his weak little cock, so I am going to keep it locked up the entire time I am gone. I will be gone during his fourth week of not cumming and I feel temptation to cheat and masturbate will be high, so that is why I have piled on the chores to keep him occupied and obedient.

Your duty is to act as a generous helpmate, humble and always subordinate. If you are angry or arguing, you have to let her win. If she says jump, you ask how high. You should not only be obedient to her wishes, both expressed and implied, you must also take an active role in making her feel like a princess, in other words, very special. Always.

Offer your assistance at every opportunity. If you see her sitting down, and are aware that she’s had a long day, sit down next to her, take her legs into your hands and ask her if she would like a foot massage. In the house, strive to take care of everything, including all of the housework. Its no special deal for you to make it your duty for washing the dishes, cooking dinner for her or removing the trash.

Without expectation of reward, wash the floors, clean the windows or wash her car. Do everything what you think that evokes a feeling in her of superiority and being served.

My favorite is when my servant husband surprises me with a romantic bath, serving me wine in the nude and tending to my every need. Its so simple to do, all you need do is to prepare the bath, help her disrobe, holding her hand when she is entering the tub and then gently massage her body with a soft sponge while basking in her beautiful glow. Nothing pays tribute to my beauty like seeing him with “my” penis full erect as he serves me in the glow of the candles as my favorite music plays. Then when he wraps me in a fresh towel while helping me out of the tub and into the bedroom, where I let him worship me with his mouth.

You must always start with the touch of a kiss. Your goal is to change your perception of intimacy to reach a point where you start to understand sex as a means of her pleasure primarily.

At this moment you begin your true submission.

You’re holding back your own pleasure, and she’ll respect you for it. Out of love you will encourage her to enjoy herself fully. Here comes another important moment: always ask permission to enter her. Offer her your pleasuring services and she will want embrace your naturally submissive role.

Soon she will realize that now she controls not only her own, but also your enjoyment. When she offers to satisfy you, you say “Yes Ma’am, please”. It will feel very grateful and full of love. But you must always ask for permission before you do anything that would bring you sexual climax. Always ask her permission to peak, and obey her reply. Let her embrace her complete control over your ability to orgasm.

Being forced to shave his cock, lock it up, and wear my panties effectively stripped him of his manhood and gave it to me. You’ve heard how a chastized man loses his male swagger and the macho behavior disappears. It’s true. My husband comes home from work every day and immediately starts on the list of chores I’ve left him. I no longer look at him as a man, but more of a maid or even servant. I’ll love him forever, but his manhood is gone to me. I relish that I had the power to do that and I wanted to take it further. I don’t want him to ever forget his role in our marriage. I wanted him feminized

Now for us, it’s not practical to dress him up like a woman in heels and make up. He has a real job after all, but I did find other things I could do to further expose his feminine side and deepen his submission to me. I disposed of all his male hygiene products. Cologne, deodorant, even his Dove for men bar soap. I stocked our bathrooms with COCO MADEMOISELLE soap from Chanel – for Women. It smells delightful and softens his skin. His deodorant? Secret for Women “Powder Fresh” scent. You know what they say “Strong enough for a man but made for a woman” lol. And finally, instead of a masculine smelling cologne (that real men wear), he now applies a squirt of whatever perfume I’m  using. Currently Ralph Lauren Pony Pink. I love giving him an extra squirt on the neck when we have a Saturday night date night.

Hubby adapted pretty well to the change with minimal griping. His biggest concern was what I did with the nearly new bottle of $80 Calvin Klein Euphoria that he just bought. I told him I hated to see it go to waste, but I couldn’t have him wearing such a manly scent anymore, so I gave it to a co-worker in the office “Rex”, who is known as the office stud and has a bulge in his pants to back that up. I could see hubby’s heart drop.

“Don’t worry baby – I told him you were allergic to it. He was very appreciative”

Hubby’s reaction earned him an extra week without orgasm – And I now find myself making up reasons to walk by Rex’s desk and smell hubby’s old cologne.

I work very hard. When I get home, I expect the house to be spotless, my wine glass full, and my husband to be cooking dinner. It’s not unreasonable. You’ll see. In a decade, this will be the norm.