In some female-led relationships the male may even be asked to occasionally provide sexual service with his penis while foregoing his own orgasm, a profound mental and physical challenge. Other female-led relationships will be oriented so the chastised male will more often than not provide sexual service in every way except by using his penis. Ultimately, it is for you to decide how best to weave chastity into your relationship. What is important to understand, however, is that chastity is one great way to keep your submissive man feeling and expressing his submissiveness to you.

Almost every account of a chastity regimen notes that the man becomes much more attentive to the needs of his partner, serving her better both sexually and in a myriad of other ways that are pleasing to her.

Female-led relationships require the male to overcome this biological predisposition and the cultural conditioning that reinforces it. Female-led relationships require the male to find ultimate pleasure in his partner’s pleasure, rather than subordinating her pleasure to his own. As the Female-led relationship develops, the female becomes more in control and more restrictive of her submissive male.

10 Rules in Femdom Relationship

1. Respect for Women – Yes I absolutely respect women and want to see a woman be the first President of the United States

2. Submission to Female Authority – I am married almost 33 years and have been submissive to my wife almost 32+ years.

3. Service to Goddess – My Goddess is my wife and I serve as her sissy husband and maid at home. In the colder months I shave completely and wear pretty lingerie to please her. Our lingerie is my responsibility to wash fold or hang. She has me happily panty trained and I am slowly collecting bras that fit my small breasts.

4. Female Body Worship – I bathe and shave her as requested and enjoy offering her oral pleasure with nothing expected in return.

5. Obedience Training & Discipline – I have purchased for her paddles, wooden handled straps, crops and canes and she uses them on me routinely. In a moments notice she can tell me to be over her lap and I will accept a hand spanking. She carries a small wooden paddle in her purse for punishment when needed outside of the house.

6. Tease & Denial – As I mentioned above, I will orally please her and expect nothing in return. Many a night I have gone to bed with the taste of her pussy and ass on my tongue and a restricted erection in my cage.

7. Enforced Male Chastity & Strict Orgasm Control – I am permanently locked in a steel chastity device and my Goddess will never let me out. She even insisted that I get my penis pierced so that there will be absolutely no chance of escape, no matter how desperate I become.

8. Strap-On Training – She has a good leather harness and several dildos she likes to use on me. I can ejaculate when pegged.

9. Discomfiture & Humiliation – I am branded with two hearts (interlocking) and I will soon be required to wear a permanent collar around my neck. She takes me panty and bra shopping and makes me wear lingerie for all outings. I must prepare tea and lunches for her various women’s groups, and curtsy and bow while serving all of the ladies in attendance.

10. Housework – I do all of the housework – cooking, cleaning, dusting, vacuuming, laundry and mopping – while she is free to relax and pursue her own interests. This is how life should be in a female-dominated home, with the male hoping to be rewarded with additional chores.

Almost everyone is in a good mood except  for my daughter. When doing a load of wash and wear David forgot to put the machine on the delicate mode. From what I can gather he received a lecture that he will remember for quite a while. If they were not so busy with the children I suspect she would have given him a page full of lines to write. It is amazing that simply having a man write something like ‘I will remember to put the washing machine on delicates’ over and over again has a way of making him remember. Entrusting your clothing to a man is kind of a big step. Most submissive men enjoy doing laundry for their mistress, but it is a responsibility that some men do not take as seriously as they should. Sometimes they are afraid to ask for instructions, or they are simply careless as David may have been in this instance.

To tell the truth, I got quite a bit scolded by my Mistress for having raised the question I did in my comment here. She has explained me that it was very inappropriate to question her authority in that way. I have been thankful to her for explaining me that and it is a lesson learned for me. I would say in reacting the way she did, she already proved my doubting wrong. In this case, like in some others in the recent past when I have not been obedient and deferring as I should, I have been losing some freedoms, which so far I took for granted. And I will have to earn them back. And already out of love to her and respect for her I have every intention of doing that.
What I like about your last blog entry is that it stresses that it is arguably not in the big things, but more in the small, everyday things that we as submissive men can serve our Mistresses well and contribute to a more fulfilled live for her. I am aware that I still have too much of a tendency to do things “big style” to please my Mistress and in-between I keep failing to fulfill the meanwhile numerous duties I have towards her. This is all spelled out in our FLR contract which I signed about half a year ago. When we first discussed the idea it felt right and not like a big change to what we doing anyway. But the closer the day came, the more it took proportions similar to “getting married” and there was growing turmoil of my emotions.

I knelt at both of their feet (YUM unto itself!) and did my part of the tasks while they talked and caught up. (It was on a second floor landing) It was so fun and so rare an opportunity to publicly kneel at multiple women’s feet while they paid me no mind. That I relish it to this day! Frankly, I think they loved it too!

Rachael (not her real name) was so sweet and thankful and at one point went off to get me a knife or some scissors or something. I got to kiss the Queen’s hand from my knees while she was gone. She beamed as I blushed and knelt happily at her feet.

In it I chronicled my impressions of an experience of being ‘volunteered’ to do a chore for a lady friend of the Queen’s.

She is a good lady and a strong and confident lady as well. I really enjoy her company and doing little chores for her is fun. And when I am doing them under the direction of Her Majesty, well it’s just delightful! Two strong and confident women gently bossing me around! It’s Like a Visit to Pussy Whipped Paradise!

So always try to think of things beforehand that will shine a good light on your Lady or one of the other Ladies who will be in attendance (hopefully a Lady that YOUR Lady Boss approves of! – Don’t make a BIG mistake here!). Then use your limited speaking time to bring up this story. Be quiet afterward and let the Ladies do the talking. If you can do this well, you will be sought after for EVERY gathering! And THAT is precisely what you want, to be endlessly surrounded by women who feel good about themselves when you are near!

The Ladies knew what to do and took it from where I had left it. I had no need to speak again which is generally a good thing. Men are here to do as they are asked, not to launch into some topic of their own and try to talk over the Ladies! And besides I had used my opportunity to fulfill one of the cardinal rules of Surrendered Husbandhood, I had honored my Queen to her friend in front of both of them. I could have blushed. Oh how I pray for MORE opportunities like that!

The ladies had all kinds of people and things to talk about and catch up on, so without any further instructions I simply knelt at both of their feet and started to remove the flags. They paid no open attention to me as I worked for several minutes until they realized that I was stuck on the very last knot and had spent a long time on it.

When they realized that I was all but done, Ms. Rachael said: “Oh look he’s been doing all the work and we’ve just been standing here talking all this time!” Then they both laughed, I blushed a little and remained docilely silent at their feet. I felt like this is EXACTLY how life should be! Women are to be revered, they should not be required to do lowly manual tasks if men are available!

Ms. Rachael went off to get me a pair of scissors to cut the final knot. When she left, Mistress wasted no time in standing very close to me. She patted me on the head and stroked my hair like I was her little doggie. I gave her back a soft and jovial “Woof Woof!”.

She laughed about it just a little. But I KNOW that she was feeling as warm inside as I was at that moment. I think at this point in the evening all three of us were in agreement about how life ought to be lived! Men were to be quiet, cute, and busy doing chores to serve women. While the women were to be served and revered.

I sometimes think my Queen laughs in situations like this because it is her fantasy coming true and she cannot believe or accept that it is now her reality. “My man is obediently kneeling at my feet and doing little menial chores for me right now! He is right where I have always wanted him and right where I have always felt that he belonged! OH YUM!”

I finished my task and the two of us left for dinner. Mistress invited Ms. Rachael to join us but she did not wish to go. I know that I would have enjoyed sitting quietly beside Her Majesty while the two of them continued their talk but, “Her Will Be Done!”

I drove us to a Thai restaurant that Mistress likes. I am not so crazy about it but again always remember…. “Her Will Be Done!”

The waiter must have been new. We had to ask him for glasses of water and when he came to take our order he actually looked right at me and said “What will you have Sir?” I said nothing and with raised eyebrows and tilted head, I looked over toward Mistress as in: “I defer unto Thee Madame.” Her Ladyship did not miss a beat as she instructed him: “I will be ordering first!”

OH MY HEART SKIPPED AN ASSERTIVE LADY BEAT!!! YUM!!! Power to the Ladies Right on! Remember, that unless there is an element of danger involved – Ladies Go First At Everything! They go through the door you held for them first. They go to the table at the restaurant first and wait for you to pull out their chair, they order first, etc. “Ladies First”

I felt like she had put him in his place and had reminded me of mine all at the same time. Her confidence and assertiveness in all things Female just seems to grow and grow! And I love it as does she! I know that she enjoyed it because she mentioned the incident later as well with a smile on her face.

Wonderful affirmation of the coming of age of a satisfying female led relationship!

To be of service to my Queen is wonderful!

To be of some service to my Queen AND her friends is delightful!

But, if I could somehow be of service to both my Queen and her friends AND all of their sisters around the world it would be infinitely better!

Let us all do all we can to usher in this new Millennium of Women properly!

My wife hasn’t done the laundry in forever. I do it four to five times weekly. I sweep and mop the tile floors and pick up and vacuum the rest of the flat. I make her coffee every day, and on the weekends make her breakfast. She gets massages either foot or full body four to five times a week. Dishes are always clean. She only cooks a few times a week. I love serving her so much.

Now that my wife is back to work I am expected to have the lunches made and breakfast served with a fruit smoothie everyday. She even has me helping her friend out with miscellaneous jobs. Her mother is very impressed which is a nice feeling for me.

I applaud you Jason for your role and position in your marriage ! My marriage of 14 years is very similar to yours. I was always pushing the baby stroller, dusting, mopping, dishes, vacuuming, ironing, grocery shopping, cleaning windows. My wife makes all of the major decisions in “her” household, and she is the absolute envy of many of her female colleagues. Most of my friends and relatives have gotten comfortable knowing who really “wears the pants” in her household. To be perfectly honest with you, I am probably one of the most happiest males in the world ! Some women are natural born leaders, as are some males, and some women followers and submissive as are so many males ! Husbands like you and I Jason are perfect role models for males in an ever changing society and world that females will eventually dominate and control. Serving my wife as a secondary/support role in our marriage has given her great assurance, that I “know my place” !!

I could see how serious she was and I just stopped arguing and got sullen and quiet. In a few minutes I was opening her car door for her (as I do every single time she goes anywhere with me – the rest of you start doing this too!) and apologizing for having been so out of control. She was semi-placated but it would take something more to repair this one.

Driving there I probably apologized two or three more times and took her hand and kissed it a couple of times. She became increasing relaxed now and as she slowly realized that I was back in my place. During the trip I thought long and hard about how I had forgotten my own advice about being open and flexible to her will and showing the love and reverence that I always felt by being calm and ready to change direction when she wanted me to. I thought about how I could better prevent this type of thing from continuing to happen, and I remembered something I had read once about a marriage counselor who was not experiencing great success in her job and had a couple come in that just could not stop fighting.

The counselor decided to try a radical new approach. Her advice was for the wife to simply put a band aid on hubbie’s mouth when they fought and he would then remember to be silent. He could not speak again until she came and removed it. Everyone thought it was a crazy idea and that it wouldn’t work. Even though the counselor never let on that she had her doubts. But as their relationship was just so tattered and close to the end, and little else had worked for them or any other couples, they tried it.

When we started talking about my ‘flexibility’ she said “That really is a good word for you. It is something that you could work on.” I really do want to be more open to HER will. I want to be more flexible to doing what she wants and living as she wants me to! I want to be a more comfortable and easier to control tool in her hands. She did not say what she said in a way that meant “I want to have more control over you”, but I know that part of her sees it as my role to be the flexible one and mold myself more to her liking. She wants me to be her “good boy” at all times and to BE her tool who will live only to serve and obey her. She likes being served. She LIKES being Queen and she WANTS to be revered and obeyed more deeply and more of the time!

When we arrived at our hotel, I was still in a fairly deeply submissive mood but I was also a bit afraid of what was to come. I had been thinking on the way down how to give more control to her. I had been thinking of how to avoid both the anger I felt when she went into the closet first and to simply BE the happy servant who waits upon his Lady Boss. At the time, I SHOULD have either gone to do something else or sat quietly with a smile waiting for her to be done. But I did not and to that failure I feel shame.

Also I NEVER should have raised my voice to her. If she is angry, it is because I have disappointed or upset her and I need to apologize and submit quickly and completely!

Once we got to the hotel room, I got down on both knees and kissed the backs of her hands. I apologized again. Probably the fifth time for what I had done, and she giggled a little because it was kind of over the top, but she enjoyed it too! Then I got up and hugged her and whispered in her ear that I didn’t want to ever argue with her again and that if she ever thought I was getting angry or out of control, then she should have a secret signal that she could give me to stop me. “You could put up your hand and say ‘stop’, or you could raise your finger to your lips and ‘shh’ me.

She seemed a little shy about the whole proposition at first but said: “I like the finger to the lips.” And right then I think I could have drawn a pretty little cartoon heart right over her now ever increasingly dominant vagina! She LOVED IT!

I think that she felt a REAL surge of power and ownership right then and even though she may have doubted it later had all really happened just like it did, she was in contented BOSS WOMAN mode from then on that night! She was satisfied that I had taken my surrender to a new level.

She had told me things that she had never said to anyone and her whole personality just changed. She has NEVER said anything mean or gossipy to me about anyone before. But I could just feel her grabbing the power that was always hers and starting to wave it around that night. Our argument, followed by her victory, and then my utter collapse at her feet had awakened a real tigress that night!

I began to feel like I had married one of the (and I say this with the UTMOST RESPECT) “Alpha Bitches” in school and it was years later and She was STILL better than anyone else and She could put them down with ease and I WAS THE LUCKIEST BOY WHO EVER BREATHED to live under HER umbrella of bitchy domination!

(You DO know that the word Bitch means Being In Total Control of Hubby don’t you?)
She had talked like this all the way there in the car in a slowly increasing tempo, and now in the bar it was peaking! I simply agreed with her with all due docility and kissed her hand a few times and apologized and was sweet and quiet. I WE BOTH LIKED IT!

She bitched TOO me and not about me concerning these people and as long as I was in a mood of total submission and completely docile to her will, she treated me like I was her good and obedient pet and she was sweet to me. But toward these others I was there to listen to her bitch session and feel the release of her long bottled up wrath and well frankly to sweetly agree with her about everything.

When I sat at the basically full bar, there was an attractive your blonde in the seat next to me. I did not think she would have any interest in old married me sitting there with someone who was obviously my wife or my date. But she did! She said “Hello” and made pleasant conversation with me! It was all I could do to keep my cool and talk with her in the sweetest most basic pleasantries while I let her size me up.

Back in the room after an hour or so in the bar with her bitching and laughing at all the people who are inferior to her, and me adoring and hoping to be worthy, we went upstairs to our room. I KNEW that my utter surrender to her and ‘our’ new plan to make certain that she not only WON EVERY ARGUMENT FROM NOW ON but that I would be silenced, and humiliated and submissive and apologetic afterward had turned HER ON! It had turned her on in a BIG way and it had released that Mighty and Sacred Bitch Beast within her! I now knew that her new level of power had gone straight to her well ‘some part of her’…!

Over the next few minutes I got to give pleasure more than once and did not take any for myself. A “win win” situation as She has pleasure, and I stay charged up to give her more pleasure later!

But WAIT THERE’S MORE!

An hour later (and it was kind of warm in the room) she asked “How asleep are you?” I was awake enough and told her so.

At that point she said: “Well if you don’t mind, you can massage my feet now.”

It was really a command but she had put in a ‘nice way’.

O M G!!!! It’s the middle of the night and “You can massage my feet now!!!???” OK!!! SUBBY HUBBY HEAVEN HERE WE COME!!!!

I got up and went to the foot of the bed. It was dark and she reached for where I was and said: “Where are you?” I told her. She laughed and handed me a little bottle of hand cream. I knelt and kissed each toe individually. I was in PARADISE!!!! Kiss, kiss, kiss. Then I kissed the ball of each foot and did a very gentle and chaste licks of the base of each toe.

I had introduced myself to MAJESTY!!! Now I got to work and worked the cream into her right foot all around and worked her muscles. Mostly it was massage and a very occasional and chaste kiss! I worked her foot for about 15 minutes. Then she complained about the heat in the room.

I worshiped and adored and massaged and kissed it for about 15 minutes also. At that time I asked where her right foot had gone. “You’ve already done that one. You can come back to bed now.” I did as I was told and got to sleep in the most delightfully Pussy Whipped state I have been in, in a long time! I slept nude and was still chaste for a few days since last she had ‘encouraged’ my release.

After I sat down, Blondie turned and started to flirt with me until she saw my collar. Then her eyes really lit up and she began to inspect that collar closely and saw Mistress holding my leash. She told Mistress how ‘pretty’ my collar looked and how she had seen several couples lately that had gone to a fully collared lifestyle, and how she thought it was just “So Romantic!” for the man to show how totally committed he was!

She told us that she was thinking about only going out with guys who would consider it now because all the collared husbands she had met seemed to be “So Sweet and So Very Well Behaved!” Mistress said: “Oh he USUALLY behaves! DON’T YOU HONEY!?” then she gave my leash a tug and acted a bit menacing toward me. I flinched and said a soft “Yes Ma’am…”. They both laughed powerfully and in a state of overwhelming control. I smiled and laughed too. But my laugh was a nervous chuckle designed only to placate them.

It seemed that ALL the women were starting to love us ‘collared boys’ and thought we were SO SWEET and Well Behaved! And the other women were all a little jealous of the relationships the Alpha Women had over their male slaves.

We went to an opera matinee and I always enjoy doing that! The crowd is so, so, well so FEMALE! Yes there are men there but mostly we are there are escorts and arm candy and I love it! The men to me look kind of nondescript while the ladies dress and hold themselves as the divine rulers of the universe that they truly are! To look around the hall at the couples there is to see many female power dynamic pairings and it’s beautiful! Not every couple looks like that but there seems to be a higher percentage there than anywhere else I know of.

Afterward we drove home and again around bedtime the excitement of the whole weekend coupled with my extended chastity had me auditioning for the role of the ‘very good boy’ for her! It had been a couple of days since my pledge of surrender had been spoken and it had not yet had to be used, but her ability to “shush” me whenever she wanted had been handed over to her from my knees and I am sure that she was starting to think “Did that really happen? Will he really obey when I first want to use it?”

I was just as determined at that point as I had been two days earlier to cede all argumentative powers to her and to BEHAVE for her at all the times. In close quarters I re-iterated my pledge. I openly promised to be ‘her good boy’ from now on. There will be no more arguments. I will simply submit. Just remember to “shoosh” me my Queen and I will surrender’! She LOVED IT!!! She started to feel a new surge of warm power and superiority all over AGAIN!

Over the past 18 months my husband and I have transitioned to a full FLR. There was some bumps on the road, but I am very satisfied with the way things have turned out. He does absolutely all the housework, doesn’t question my decisions, gives me wonderful foot massages, wears panties only, shave his cock and balls, and worships me orally whenever I want for as long as I want. As you have pointed out many times, chastity training is the key to a successful FLR. Hubby went from several releases a week to our current regime of one very three weeks – sometimes four. This seems to be just the right duration to keep him constantly obedient and void of any free will. I often employ the use of a chastity device that I hold the keys for. When we started he couldn’t wear the thing for 60 minutes without complaining of discomfort. Through patience and sheer determination I have regularly kept him locked for weeks at a time. Denying not only orgasms, but even his ability to get hard is an absolute erotic power trip that words cannot describe. Our love making is the best it’s ever been. Without the ability to achieve an erection his focus remains solely on his pleasuring his Queen.  At the end of the month I will be going on a 4 day business trip. Hubby will be home alone. I am working on quite a long list of chores and some deep cleaning housework that will keep him busy, but I don’t totally trust him to not take advantage of the situation and play with his weak little cock, so I am going to keep it locked up the entire time I am gone. I will be gone during his fourth week of not cumming and I feel temptation to cheat and masturbate will be high, so that is why I have piled on the chores to keep him occupied and obedient.

Your duty is to act as a generous helpmate, humble and always subordinate. If you are angry or arguing, you have to let her win. If she says jump, you ask how high. You should not only be obedient to her wishes, both expressed and implied, you must also take an active role in making her feel like a princess, in other words, very special. Always.

Offer your assistance at every opportunity. If you see her sitting down, and are aware that she’s had a long day, sit down next to her, take her legs into your hands and ask her if she would like a foot massage. In the house, strive to take care of everything, including all of the housework. Its no special deal for you to make it your duty for washing the dishes, cooking dinner for her or removing the trash.

Without expectation of reward, wash the floors, clean the windows or wash her car. Do everything what you think that evokes a feeling in her of superiority and being served.

My favorite is when my servant husband surprises me with a romantic bath, serving me wine in the nude and tending to my every need. Its so simple to do, all you need do is to prepare the bath, help her disrobe, holding her hand when she is entering the tub and then gently massage her body with a soft sponge while basking in her beautiful glow. Nothing pays tribute to my beauty like seeing him with “my” penis full erect as he serves me in the glow of the candles as my favorite music plays. Then when he wraps me in a fresh towel while helping me out of the tub and into the bedroom, where I let him worship me with his mouth.

You must always start with the touch of a kiss. Your goal is to change your perception of intimacy to reach a point where you start to understand sex as a means of her pleasure primarily.

At this moment you begin your true submission.

You’re holding back your own pleasure, and she’ll respect you for it. Out of love you will encourage her to enjoy herself fully. Here comes another important moment: always ask permission to enter her. Offer her your pleasuring services and she will want embrace your naturally submissive role.

Soon she will realize that now she controls not only her own, but also your enjoyment. When she offers to satisfy you, you say “Yes Ma’am, please”. It will feel very grateful and full of love. But you must always ask for permission before you do anything that would bring you sexual climax. Always ask her permission to peak, and obey her reply. Let her embrace her complete control over your ability to orgasm.

Princess said She wanted to get more dominant and push our D/s relationship further than the chastity and foot worshipping play we’ve been doing so far. As such, we decided to slightly update our servant agreement:

6. Obedience:

6.1 In general
The servent shall obey all orders from the Mistress, without any restriction except when the said order could affect the reputation or relationships of the servant with a third party.

6.2 Sexual satisfaction of the Mistress
The servant shall accept to satisfy any sexual demand of the Mistress, without any restriction.

6.3 Complains and refusals
The servant shall not complain about or refuse any order from the Mistress. Any violation of this rule shall be punished appropriately.

7. House chores

7.1 Condition of the house
The servant is in charge of the condition of the house and shall be held responsible if it does not meet the expectation of the Mistress, at any moment.

7.2 Laundry
The servant is in charge of the laundry and shall be able to provide the Mistress with any desired clothes at any moment, with the appropriate care.

7.3 Cooking and groceries
The servant is in charge of the cooking and groceries, and shall be able to offer a breakfast, a lunch and a dinner to the Mistress every day.

He takes me back to his bare tech-bachelor apartment, and we sit on the lone piece of furniture in his living room drinking wine. “More,” I said with a snap, and gestured my empty glass in front of his face.

“Yes Ava,” he trots off to refill it.

I snatch the refilled glass out of his hands. “You’re going to have to anticipate my needs. You should notice these things, like when my glass is empty. You’re going to have to learn some fucking manners if you want to serve a woman like me.”

“Yes Ava.”

“Clothes off, I’m bored of telling you these things. You’ve talked to me enough now to know what I like. You’re useless to me in this state.” He scrambles to remove his clothes, and I catch sight of the black lace underwear he has apparently been sporting under his jeans through our date.

“What is this?” I stick my finger under the side strap and then let it hit his ass with a snap.

“I thought you would like them, Ava.”

“I can’t see why you would think that, wearing this tiny underwear. Did you take it from some vanilla girlfriend? Does the girl you stole them from know your ass is stretching it out? You just look slutty. Kneel on the floor. On all fours, Slut.” He drops to a prone posture on the floor.

“I like all this very much Ava,” he says to the carpet.

“I don’t give a flying fuck what you like.” I put my feet on his back and finish my wine, then I move to sit on his back until his limbs begin to shake from holding up my weight. I wind my hands through his hair and yank his head back, “I like this, and so you will like it, you got that Slut?”

“Yes Ava.” I slap him hard across the face. He shudders and his erection pops out of the tiny lace underwear.

“What the fuck is that? You liked that? What else do you like, Slut? What else are you gonna beg me for?” I bark in his face.

The next two hours are a blur of impact, swatting him red with a wood paddle, a rubber cane the thickness of my pinky, a heavy leather strap that raises the welts on his ass and thighs. The aneros prostate toy in his ass makes his cock drool on the floor. He never cums, I never let him.

With his glasses off he is nearly blind; I make him beg me to have them back, make him lick my feet, make him rub my legs and thighs and beg beg beg for my forgiveness as I push his face to the floor with my feet and make him start over again and again.

I sit on his chest, clamping down his arms with my legs. I slap him hard on the stomach and inner thighs. I make him confess the things he has masturbated to, the first woman that humiliated him like this, the first time he masturbated to fetish porn, the first woman that rejected him for his sexual preferences, the first time he masturbated to me, the things he has masturbated to that make him feel ashamed. More, I tell him. Slap. I want all of it, don’t lie to me. Slap. You fucking liar, tell me. Slap.

Behind my ass I can hear his head rasping for breath, he is choking back tears. His body is printed, marked red with my handprints, my questions and demands.

she experimented a few times with ruined orgasms, but eventually preferred to just deny me, in essence, permanently; a situation which I’ve accepted because it’s really what I’d asked for — not specifically, of course, but rather as a circumstance extending from asking for her control over me in the first place.

But it’s the way that our lives outside of the bedroom have come to merge with our play inside the bedroom that has now had the greatest impact on our marriage, and by extension, the future (if there is one) of this blog.

I’ve written about how Mrs. Edge has been very involved with the church, but usually from the volunteer aspects of running the various dinners and social functions that are the lifeblood of a large church in the suburbs. But in recent years she has become more religious-oriented, and in the course of attending a lot of women’s groups, women’s retreats, and assorted classes, she has developed a new conception of marriage and relationships — in part because of her accepting control of my sexuality — that has given her the mindset that she has a moral obligation to take control outside the bedroom as well.

There’s an irony in that her becoming more deeply involved in this aspect of Christianity has made her both less inclined to be sexual in general, let alone kinky, while at the same time her attitudes (and actions) have become more, well, femdommish — although I wouldn’t dare mention this to her because she has declared that she is moving away from such things. Indeed, Mrs. Edge has always claimed to be straight vanilla, and has never wavered from her position that our use of chastity devices or orgasm control has been anything but “normal” sex. That attitude hasn’t changed much, except that she now thinks that devices are unnecessary because a well-trained husband (meaning me) should no longer need them, and that any accidents or loss of control on my part (intentionally or otherwise) should be dealt with swiftly so they don’t become a habit. Consequently, over the last few months she has asked me to discard the small handful of toys that we’ve acquired over the years.

Because I’ve already been accustomed to long-term denial, I’m not overly concerned about her continuing to expect control over my orgasms; after a decade and a half of this lifestyle, it’s become second nature to me, and it’s rare that I even expect to come during our lovemaking — which of late has become more typically my performing oral on her until she’s satisfied and sleepy. It’s funny, but for most of our marriage, she didn’t particularly care about my going down on her. I mean, she enjoyed it when I did, but it wasn’t something she ever requested. This past year, though, it’s become a requirement several nights a week, usually at bedtime, after which I spoon her until she falls asleep.

For a while now she has been referring to this as “worshipping at her temple,” a euphemism that she picked up in one of her women’s groups. Occasionally, I’ll be working on something in the office and she’ll just walk into the room and announce that “It’s time for worship services,” and I’m expected to drop everything and attend her needs. Once satisfied, she thanks me lovingly and sends me back to whatever I happened to be doing.

There’s no expectation of intercourse; that’s reserved for the evening, and only before bedtime. I enjoy it just as much as ever, even without coming, which, as you can imagine, can be sometimes difficult. I’ve learned to hold back because I’m now required to “clean up after any accidents.” Yeah, the idea sounds pretty hot in all the chastity erotica, but trust me: the reality is very different, and even after a few months I’m no happier about doing it. Worse, I’m beginning to suspect that Mrs. Edge sometimes, well, intentionally provokes those accidents, for reasons I still can’t understand.

The biggest change in our relationship, though, is that her readings and women’s group sessions have led to her insistence that she, as the spiritual head of the household, has an obligation to set a course for us as a couple — and that obligation carries the requirement that she needs to  “continually correct the course” (as she has put it several times) when it deviates. Not that it deviates often, but when it does, for some reason it always seems to end up back on me.

Credit card is overspent? That’s on me for not calling her attention to beforehand. Cautioning her on her spending? I’m overstepping my boundaries and not giving her enough credit for being financially savvy. If I come home a little late from work? I should have called to let her know I was working late. If I call to let her know I’m working a bit late? I shouldn’t have woken her from her afternoon nap. I cleaned the bathroom on Sunday? I should have done it Saturday when she was out shopping so she wouldn’t have to smell the cleaning products. Clean it when she’s out shopping? I should have been… you know, I still haven’t figured out what made her upset that time.

Interestingly, she hasn’t insisted that I go to church more often.  In fact, she often skips Sunday services, herself, although she rarely misses the several Christian women’s group meetings each week — after which she usually comes home affectionate, if pensive. Dinner the next day is when she generally talks to me about things, including the need for the occasional “course correction.”

Those “corrections” originally felt like a bit of kinky play; you know, like “funishment.” Not that Mrs. Edge considered any of it be kinky, mind you, because she simply does not identify that way, and would be a little offended if you suggested it. Over the last few months, however, they have taken on a more serious edge; we no longer seem to “play” with it, but rather, she has become more determined to “correct” those little issues. What I mean is that she has taken it on as a serious duty because (as she insists) it will only serve to strengthen our marriage. Just before Christmas, she told me to go online shopping in order to replace our “toy” riding crop (an anniversary gag gift from a friend of hers) with a more “professional” model that would hold up better under actual use.

In fact, Mrs. Edge has recently taken to insisting that I need regular “reminders,” as she calls them, because there’s little to “correct” anymore.  Those reminder sessions seem to be shortly after those Christian women’s group meetings, too. And what with the Women’s Spiritual Reflection group, the Christian Women’s Reading group, the Women’s Godly Journey group, the Christianity and the Modern Woman group, the Women’s Christian Leadership group, and the Discover Your Goddess Inside group, she’s out at least a couple of nights a week. I’m being “reminded” quite a bit lately.

The “course correction” and “reminder” sessions are, as I mentioned, usually the day after one of her many Christian women’s group meetings, typically right after I get home from work. She greets me, always affectionately, and gives me a few minutes to unwind. Then she kisses me lovingly, and gives me a rundown of the things that she believes need some correction or (more typically) a “gentle reminder.” She then directs me to the bedroom where I’m to strip down, bend over grasping the footboard, and to “think about things” while I wait for her. After a few minutes, she comes in, reassures me that she loves me, and that this is all for the good of our marriage. And then she begins “correcting” or “reminding” me. There’s no rhyme or reason as to how long she corrects me; she prays out loud as she does this, and finishes when the prayer ends. Once finished, she kisses me, and tells me to take a shower while she finishes cooking dinner. After dinner, we snuggle on the couch watching some TV, during which she’s always very affectionate. Interestingly, correction and reminder nights are usually when she requests that I “worship at her temple” before bedtime.

And that brings me back around to what I mentioned earlier, about the future of this blog.

Easter is coming, and that represents a spiritual rebirth for Christians. Mrs. Edge has stepped up the corrections and the reminders this past week, and over the weekend we had a few long talk about what she sees for the future of our marriage. I can’t say that I’m completely surprised, nor can I say that it’s unwelcome. Yes, there are some aspects that have me a little apprehensive, but she explained that it’s to be expected. She has been reassuring me that she loves me more than ever, of course, even as her demeanor has become more firm. I have no doubt of this, for some reason; in fact, in many respects it feels as if our relationship has become stronger, and more intimate. The closeness has made the corrections and reminders worth it.

You opened my eyes to an aspect of my years in a female led relationship, that being that in our home compliments are always directed to my wife or her mother; never to me. Last week my mother-in-law had her romance reader group over for a get together. She had me clean the house from top to bottom that day. As usual i served the Ladies coffee, tea, and some special desserts that my mother-in-law ordered i prepare. The Ladies loved the desserts and beverages and directed the compliments to her – not me – as i feel is appropriate. The Ladies sensed that my success, acknowledged or not – should be attributed to the direction and supervision my mother-in-law provides. Similarly, the women may direct me to, for example, get them a drink but never say ‘thank you’ when it is delivered. The thought is why should a Lady thank me for a service to which she is entitled.

My husband definitely does not enjoy any of the punishment or discipline sessions I put him through, but he is grateful for them. He knows that as a submissive male he needs it and that they make him a better slave for my use. And they also serve to reassure him that I am serious about femdom and our relationship.

Congratulations to Charles on learning to curtsy. I can’t think of a more appropriate way of a man showing deference to women than to curtsy to them. I was taught to curtsy by my wife’s grandmother, Joan. She instructed me on the nuances of the curtsy and made me practice, and practice, and practice. Once she was satisfied that I had mastered the motions i ‘came out’ to the other women of the family – i’ve been curtsying ever since. Since i wear an apron when at home or when visiting relatives I have the added benefit of incorporating the apron into my curtsying. I move my right foot in back of my left and stoop at the knees while extending my apron with both hands. I bow my head as I stoop and extend my apron. The bow is mandatory and has to be such that i do not look into the woman’s face until I have completed the curtsy. It was a bit awkward at first but I soon mastered what we all feel is an important – and for me, exciting – show of male deference to women.

If I’m carrying a tray as I would be when serving drinks, the tray is balanced on my right hand freeing my left to extend my apron. A curtsy is expected when I first encounter the women and periodically afterward. When I come from work I’ll put on my apron and go to my mother-in-law, curtsy, and ask, “How may I serve you Madame?” It’s the beginning of my daily service and housekeeping routine. Any women of the family and their female guests are entitled to a curtsy.

Recognizing that men are somewhat less graceful than women, we have a variation on a full curtsy called a ‘stoop and bow’ The stoop and bow does away with bringing my right foot back and substitutes a deeper bow at the knee and of my head. The stoop and bow is ONLY used when carrying a tray, otherwise a full curtsy is deserved. I curtsy or stoop and bow when entering a room where the women are seated and, upon leaving, turn, face the women, and curtsy before leaving the room. The same applies if I encounter a woman guest. For example, when answering the door, I curtsy to the woman entering and again curtsy to her after showing her in. I don’t curtsy to everyone, but it is expected for women in the family, their friends, and guests.

Over the years we’ve met similar couples and have introduced still others to the lifestyle. It’s a low key process that usually has Nancy or my mother-in-law, Sue, inviting a few women for coffee and talk. During these visits our guest ladies see an apron clad husband – me! – happily serving the coffee and then disappearing to get back to his housework until called, usually by Nancy ringing a bell. I’m mostly included in these little coffee chats so that our women guests can see the authority Nancy wields and how I obey. Later on Nancy usually has me take questions from our woman guests. We’ve encouraged a lot of women and we have many more men doing housework and being obedient, especially in situations where the woman out-earns the man. We have male workshops, too. These to introduce men to the lifestyle and make them see that ‘it’s OK to do what your wife tells you to do’. Plenty of men do just that – and love it, but we’ll save that discussion for another time.

My wife and mother-in-law are part of a family where the women are very much in charge. While we don’t scream that from the roof tops it’s not a secret either. I’m submissive to my wife and her mother and to all women in general and I conduct myself accordingly. I’m polite and differential to the women at work whether they be executives or clerical staff – I refer to all of them as ‘Ma’am’.

My deference used to raise a lot of questions from the women concerning my relationship with my wife. They all know now that Nancy is in charge – it’s no secret as far as I’m concerned. If asked out after work everyone knows I will call Nancy and ask permission which, if denied, is likely because my housework is my priority. They know that Nancy controls the money, gives the orders, and sets our social agenda. They know that I have a routine of housework and do whatever else Nancy or her mother tell me to do. What the women in work don’t know is how much I love this lifestyle – once they find out the last obstacle in their pursuing their own Femdom situation is eliminated.

Last week end Nancy and I were at a mall and ran into one of the accounting clerks from my company. I was only too happy to introduce her to Nancy and then, according to our little family protocol, step away so the women could talk. Perhaps to show her authority Nancy pointed to a bench about 50 feet away and told me “you sit there until I call for you. The woman asked Nancy plenty of questions about how she might train her husband as Nancy had obviously trained me – she loved my unmistakable obedience and loved that I was carrying Nancy’s purse – and I kept her purse even while sitting on the distant bench. She left Nancy encouraged and invited to a coffee at our house to discuss moving her own marriage towards a Femdom model.

I can tell you something for sure. I prefer to be a woman’s housewife than househusband. And I do love the “gender role reversal” (I don’t know if that is the right term) in which the Dominant woman takes on a gender role reversal to the traditional patriarchal roles but the submissive man or woman takes on the old, kind of “suppressed” female role. That means things that can really touch a chord there for me are that for the submissive partner some rules (or norms – depends how flexible the Dominant wants to be about it) should include things like not voting, not talking too much about sports or politics, raising children, changing diapers

I now greet my wife, coming and going, on my knees in command position with my head at her feet. We chat for a few minutes before she gives me permission to kiss her feet and arise. Learning this protocol that has become very important in both our lives came directly from you.

Fortunately I found a very submissive man than wanted nothing more than to kneel at my feet and serve me. We discussed everything and I told him that I although I loved him dearly, he would not be allowed any intercourse, and that I saw it as my responsibility to train, punish and discipline him as needed. I expected him to be my slave just as much as he would be my husband. I was gratified when he fell to his knees before me with his head at my feet. And begged me to make him my husband and my slave, to train him as I saw fit. He knew that although he wanted a femdom marriage very badly. He also knew that he would need training if his dreams to be a woman’s husband and slave where ever to come true. I was impressed, most men think femdom is easy and training is a code word for kink. He is a man totally at home living under strict female rule, doing as he’s told, being held accountable for his mistakes and asking permission from a woman.

I am started permanent orgasm denial two months ago after having 2-3 orgasms a year. It is something my wife always wanted. There are several reasons why. She is bi with a leaning towards women. She has not allowed penetration for the last 30 years. She does. Ot need my penis for her sexual satisfaction unless she is teasing and edging me until I am moaning, which triggers her orgasm. She enjoys denying me so much that she laughs with glee when she edges me.

My Domme said today…..’Has it sunk in yet that you’ll never cum again’
After a lot of begging and pleading on my part She then said ‘Just kidding’. But I’m scared She will make it permanent.

Permanent, no but I was kept locked 24/7 for two years with one single day of freedom. Aside from that day, absolutely no orgasm, touching, arousal or even sight of my penis was allowed. I’d be milked once a week if I was lucky, sometimes that would be extended to once a month if I were being punished. Milking would always take place with me completely bound and either hooded or blindfolded & gagged. Most times I’d be milked in the belt before my wife would remove the belt, clean it & me then reinstall it.

She would usually use prostate massage to milk me but if I were being punished She’d do it electrically and literally force the cum out of me – that process was to be bluntly honest both humiliating and painful if I attempted to resist and so was used only as a punishment. The e-stim can be very pleasurable if applied in a different way, Her intent at that time was solely to punish me.

Why… because I was a very stupid man and decided to play away from home. My choice when She found out (She has always been Dominant) was simple – accept total & complete enforced chastity for as long as She desired or pack my bags. We’re still together and our relationship now is stronger than it’s ever been so the process seems to have worked for us.
Then three years ago i met Mistress Sonia and all that history went flying out the window. Mistress Sonia’s interest and love for the lifestyle has only kept growing and Her singular attention has remained only on Her slave, this slave. After the first year the only emergency key was Commanded removed from a KeySure plastic box and placed in a Master resettable combination key safe that Mistress Sonia only knows the combination too. slave was then told that this is permanent.

This July will be the 3rd year locked.

No milkings, no nothing, just constant teasing and a Command to have a much smaller steel device prepared to be permanently locked on for a “re-locking ceremony” this July. The new device will be of Mistress Sonia’s design and size choice.

it has been 9 month now since my last release and my KH telling me maybe some time end of this year she will let me be unlock hands tie clean up an shave an lock back again no orgasm for me ever again she said

I have been in it for over 3 years and not by choice. it is rules of my x-girlfriend whom i serve as a live-in slave. The only way she would let me remain in her life after we broke up was to be her slave and being obsessed and desperate to do this i agreed but it is hard work, humilating and not so much fun. The Chastity is painful but worse is i am beaten and tortured very regularly for mistakes or for her pleasure. also chained and sleep chained in a metal cage every night of my life. it is sad i would subject to this to be in her life but i can not leave her and desire to get back together with her but i know it will never happen and she is using me and torturing me. maybe my circumstances is very different but still i can not understand people who want to be in chastity., I want out badly and i have come on here to see if there is a trick to try to get off in while in the device. ive been crying everynight to her to be released but instead she makes it worse and will tease me and use my face as a foot stool with me chained below her every night. and if i am whining too much i will be whipped very badly.

My wife says 2016 will be a year of no orgasms at all and she is a woman of her word. If it goes well she wants to just cut them out because she has only be giving me pity sex, but enjoys the teasing, very much. I got used to just a few orgasms a year and quite frankly, I enjoy the feeling of wanting an orgasm to the actual orgasm itself. She has change a lot. I am naked when home and now massage her every day. My butt is black and blue form her hard paddlings which she had grown to love. She went from being horrified for bruising me to now paddling me so that my right cheek matches my left in the number of bruising.

wife does not like my penis at all she had never like it from the start to small does not please her after daughters were born it was then lock up came

i do perfrom oral now then when she ask for it but ohter then that just lock in my cb6000

I stopped letting my husband have proper orgasms in December 2014. Since then all he has had are ruined ones and I milk his prostate from time to time. Looking back it is the best thing I have ever done, he has changed so much for the better.

I’m in permanent orgasm denial for more then 8 month now. My girlfriend hates sperm and never let me cum at all.

Yes i am in total permanent chastity and have been now for over 30 years. i was locked originally by my first Lady Owner who despised owning a male who could masturbate. i signed her contract of total permanent chastity and was locked and pierced immediately. i was never milked ever and had occasional seepages mainly during the night for which i was punished by caning the morning after. i was then sold to another Lady who also required absolute total chastity without relief.

After close to a year of playing with chastity, we just decided this week that chastity will be permanent for me.

Why? Well, I guess the simple answer is we have a really great sex life when I’m kept chaste. We started experimenting several months ago with keeping me locked up during sex, and my wife loved it. She had HATED sex for our whole marriage until we started keeping me locked up during sex. I, on the other, am thrilled to have a wife that actually enjoys sex now. We went from terrible sex once every 4-6 weeks to sex two or three times a week, and my wife enjoys it every time.

We tried increasing durations of chastity for me, because we didn’t think I should go completely without orgasms. Well, it was a disaster every time I was released for an orgasm. Our sex life would crash for a couple of weeks, I would feel depressed, and it was just a horrible cycle.

After discussing how much we had gained from my chastity and how destructive it was to let me have orgasms, we decided it was time to stop the rollercoaster and just keep my permanently locked up.

We’re less than a week into it, so there’s not a lot to say yet. The one thing I can say is that it does give me some peace. Instead of that constant anxiety of wondering when my next orgasm will be, I don’t have to wonder anymore. I know the answer is never. As strange as that may sound, it’s like having closure to a long struggle.

So far I do have some things that I am a little nervous about. I wonder what it will be like to never have an erection again. I wonder what the long term emotional impact will be of knowing that the only orgasms I will enjoy will be my wife’s.

But, I think the big part that a lot of guys don’t consider is the psychological aspect. If you and your partner are serious about it, it is a life changing decision. Even though my wife and I had discussed it for a couple of months and we both sincerely believe it is the best choice for our sexual relationship, I had some anxiety for the first few days after committing to it. You don’t realize how much if your self image is tied to your penis until you make the decision to pretty much eliminate it from your life.

Before any couple chooses this, they should really think hard about what is motivating the decision. If you both just think it’s kinky fun, or your wife enjoys intercourse, this probably isn’t the choice for you. We made this decision because my wife has severe vaginismus, and intercourse was always very painful. When I introduced chastity to help myself stop masturbating, we experimented once with me staying locked up during sex. My wife loved having sexual intimacy without the dreaded need to give me intercourse. She was like a whole different woman. She talked to me more, she touched me more, she smiled, and she had the first orgasm of her life. We were hooked from that first experience. I loved having a wife who actually enjoyed sexual intimacy, and she was overwhelmed with how fun sex could be.

It took several months of trying longer durations between orgasms for me, but we finally decided to just get rid of them altogether. Any time we decided it was a night for me to be let loose for an orgasm, sex just sucked. My wife just couldn’t get into it because she knew in the end it would mean painful intercourse. We also tried the “honor system”, where I agreed not to touch my penis, masturbate, or have intercourse without the use of a chastity device. I only lasted a few days. My wife felt kind of bad that I would be locking my penis up for ever, but the device was my choice. I just can’t make love to my wife with a free cock and NOT manipulate her into letting me penetrate her. I tried hard, but it just didn’t work.

I’m posting mostly for moral support. My wife insisted on permanent chastity a couple of months ago. We just had a baby a couple of weeks ago, and the recovery period for her is driving me nuts. Being in permanent chastity, my only sexual outlet is her, and since she isn’t feeling exactly frisky while she recovers, I have no outlet for my sexuality.

It’s been almost 2 months since I had an erection, and up until the birth I doing okay because she was playing with me regularly. The inability to have erections or orgasms didn’t seem too bad because she was still feeling up to making love and that gave me some relief. I was leaking enough through the cage when we would make love to give me a little relief and the act of passionately making love gave me a psychological relief.

For those who are either in permanent chastity or are kept locked for extended periods, how do you cope with times where your wife just isn’t up to doing anything?

It’s funny how things can change over time. Since telling my wife about how I don’t remember what erections and orgasms feel like, what she likes during sex has changed.

Now her favorite thing to do is to have me rub my cage against her clit until she orgasms, and frequently throughout she asks me teasingly if it feels good. Of course she knows good and well I can’t feel a dang thing, and I think she gets really horned up thinking about that.

She also has started to caress my balls and cage after she climaxes while she looks me in the eyes. She doesn’t say a word, but her eyes do all the talking. She revels in knowing that my penis and balls are hers permanently and I’ll never use them again. She takes great pleasure in knowing that my caged penis will give her orgasms, but will never have another one.

I’ve also noticed that my reaction to her orgasms has changed. It used to be that when she had an orgasm, I would feel a strong yearning to have one of my own. But now I feel a sense of curiosity. I watch her writhing in pleasure and can only wonder what that must feel like.